Years ago, I was on an elevator with a man who was holding a painting in a nice frame. (The painting was in the nice frame, not him.)  I made a remark about the painting, which started an interesting conversation. It turned out that he was an art-auctioneer. This was on a cruise ship, and his job was to sell artwork to the passengers. He was very friendly and frank. He admitted to me that the reason he was on the elevator holding the painting was that he found it was a good way to strike up conversations with people and invite them to attend his art auction. He said that he had been a salesman of one type or another for thirty years. I had always been interested in sales and marketing, so I took the opportunity to ask him this question: What is the most common mistake people make in sales? He answered that the most common mistake is assuming that they know what the prospective buyer cares about. For example, perhaps the salesperson starts rattling off information about the price, certain features, or certain benefits. This is called doing a product dump. Often times, it’s none of these things that the prospective buyer cares about. People have all kinds of reasons for buying things; many of which are completely unpredictable. It’s important to keep in mind that they might not be using it themselves, or they might not be paying for it themselves. Perhaps they want to buy it for a movie scene in which it will be crushed, set on fire, and thrown off a cliff. Every customer is different, and it’s important to remember that they can have a wide variety of reasons for being interested. Rather than assume it’s something obvious that they care about, it’s much better to simply ask them and let them tell you.

I had another interesting experience recently at the dentist’s office. It was my first time at this particular office and, naturally, I had to fill out several forms. One of the forms had questions like these: What qualities do you like in a dentist? What are your biggest concerns when visiting a dentist? What do you want most from a dentist? I’m not crazy about filling out forms, especially with questions like those. When the hygienist entered the room, I asked why those questions were on the form. She said it’s so the dentist can customize the approach for each customer. It turns out that different people have very different feelings about dentists. Some people are afraid of dental work because they have had a painful experience in the past. Some are self-conscious about the appearance of their teeth. Some are worried about high costs. From a marketing perspective, I thought it was very clever to ask questions to find out what each customer cared about. Knowing what customers and prospective customers care about helps us serve them better. Whenever possible, find ways to listen to your customer before assuming that you know what they are most interested in and why.

Here are a few ways to be a better listener for the sake of marketing and serving your customers:

• Find a few questions that get people talking about what they want, and why they want it.
• Avoid yes or no questions. Open-ended questions are better, such as: What brings you here today? What are your main concerns? How can we help you find what you are looking for?
• While listening, don’t try to craft an answer. Try to understand exactly what they are saying.
• Don’t assume you know the rest of what they are going to say.
• Don’t interrupt them.
• Pay attention to non-verbal cues.
• Try to be someone they can talk to, instead of someone who is constantly pushing an agenda.

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